Sunday, April 27, 2003

It's Sunday, the kids and Keisha went to church which was going to be outdoors and a softball game and picnic following. I woke up with bad allergies in the middle of the night as well as back pain. It's supposed to rain tomorrow night. I can always tell at least 2 days ahead. When I was little I remember the "old" folks talking the same thing. I have arthritis in my spine and other joints as well as fibromyalgia. I wonder if its the change in barometric pressure that "arthritic" people know about upcoming weather changes?

Keisha woke up at 5 something complaining she had trouble talking!!! Duh! She wasn't supposed to be talking at that hour, right? I put some Vick's on her chest and she seemed adequately attuned that she had been taken cared of(?). I put in one of her tapes and she eventually fell asleep. I don't know when I finally did, I just eventually did.
Yesterday, she woke up and I had my door open. Her Dad was asleep and Mom at school, so I asked her if she wanted me to fix her cereal. She wanted the peanut butter kind with chocolate milk. By the time she was finished in the bathroom it was ready. She looked at me and said, "I love you, Nana". That was the first time without being prompted. I could have cried. We read a book about the tooth fairy while she ate. She lost her first tooth this week. It was one of those special moments in ones life that is so simplistic it is meaningful. Probably only those that are grandparents can understand. It isn't like being a parent is it?

I have had depression this week and she sure brought some light in.

Is there anyone out there with similar experiences? i'd love to hear from you. Post your comments here or E-mail me.

Friday, April 25, 2003

I won't know the results of the test until May 16th, which seems like an endless time frame from now. I watched my mother suffer slowly for 3 years with her disease. She never told us what was wrong; we found out from her "heartless" (pun intended) cardiologist 7 weeks before she died. By that time there wasn't anything we could do but try to make her comfortable.

I had the "privilege" of staying with her almost 24/7. It was painful yet I was so grateful I could help her- the one who gave me life was slipping away daily. She had to be watched for her breathing; first it was if she quit breathing for 30 seconds call the nurse; then 45; 60 up to a minute and a half.

One of my most poignant memories of that time was she had many "mini" strokes and I was helping her drink some milk but she had forgotten how to drink. I put the milk in her mouth and it drooled back out and she just smiled at me. I fought the tears as I wiped her up. My mother was now my child.

My siblings visited often but never stayed long. One of them told me I could handle it better than the rest. The truth was someone had to handle it, and no one else took up the torch so I did. It's not that any one of us loved her more or less than another; it was each person handling it differently. It was years before I recovered from that experience and let myself grieve.

So if there are any folks out there with a similar situation I'd like to hear from you. To my siblings- I love each of you and you are special to me.

Familial Dilated Cardiomyopathy Project

Hi, everyone, this Dan Johnson. Mom just came back from getting an echo cardiogram done. Our family has a history of Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy. The above link points to a research project in Oregon, which is being done to investigate the famililal (easy for you to say) link in this disease. My grandmother died of this disease, and currently two uncles and one cousin (one year older than I, who just turned 33) have this disease and are on a waiting list to receive new hearts.

So, please keep us all in your prayers, and we invite you to share your thoughts with us!

Thanks and God bless!

P.S. I found the above link while doing a Google search for 'cardiomyopathy'. Here is the link to all of the search results: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=cardiomyopathy&btnG=Google+Search. One interesting thing to note is that Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy is the most common heart disease in cats. Now that I've piqued your curiosity (no pun intended), go check it out!

Sunday, April 20, 2003

Today is Easter Sunday, the greatest of all days in the Christian faith, I believe. Jesus offers us total and merciful forgiveness and salvation through his death and Ressurection. Just as everyday there is a surprise in the flowers or a tree that has bloomed out because of the renewal of spring we are renewed in our faith.

My family made special cookies last night. They symbolize the death AND Resurrection. I will put the recipe in my blog at a later date. I don't have it down here with me right now. So, to anyone who reads this--Happy and Blessed Easter!!

He is risen!!!!!

Update: My son posted the link to the recipe on his blog.

Thursday, April 17, 2003

Yesterday was my oldest son's birthday. Where have 33 years gone?

I am so grateful for him and his family. They have remained a constant in my life.

Keisha is complaining of earache today. Could be allergies or cutting new teeth or an infection. We just don't like to delay her getting to the doctor when she complains because of her hearing problems. When an ear hurts she can't wear her aid in that ear.

At therapy this week there was another patient (client) in the waiting room, who was having a great conversation with someone. He and I were the only 2 people there. Whomever he was talking with was making him laugh. Yesterday, Dan, Jennie and I went to Rooster's for some hot wings. They have quotations al over and one of them said"you are just jealous because I'm the only one hearing the voices!" It reminded me of the guy at Eastway. The therapist said a lot of the clients report that their " voices" are friendly.

The weather has been so pleasant but today calls for rain. I could have told that 2 days ago with my back. My Dad used to say it was hell getting old and I agree in this aspect. I love having the knowledge of life that can only come from living 50 yrs. It can't be taught; only lived.

Monday, April 14, 2003

Today I heard on "The View" that Meridith Viera says she read that the US troops got the Iraqi troops to come out of hiding when they reached Bagdad by distributing pamphlets and using bullhorns saying the Iraqi soldiers were impotent! Apparently, this is a huge insult(duh)! Hey, all is fair in love and war as they say.

The yard has come alive with the spring flowers blooming. Everyday is a surprise! Maybe things for the household will brighten up too. Its hard to watch your kids go through struggle and be helpless. I am never hopeless.

Thank you God for Your Word because that never changes.

Sunday, April 13, 2003

I haven't felt good for a few days. Fibromyalgia symptoms and allergies. If I take all the medicine prescribed I sleep. Guess that removes symptoms.

Keisha fed the dog egg shells yesterday. I guess he is OK. Maybe he needed the calcium! Her teeth are still intact. It looks like it will be a little while till she loses them.

My kids were like 7 when they lost their teeth. It seems that everything happens fast with kids nowadays. I have to wonder after they experience everything sooner what is there to look forward to? I didn't get my first Barbie until I was 13. I wasn't allowed to date or wear makeup until I was 16. Times are different and I go with the flow with a little sadness for young people today.

I shared a bike with 4 other siblings and that lasted us alll through our growing up years. I never had a whole piece of fruit until I was married. Growing up in a large family (9) taught me a lot about sharing and to make my own fun. Now, if it doesn't operate with batteries it seems kids don't know what to do. Oh well.

Wednesday, April 09, 2003

Today was a terrific day for the Iraqi people. How could you not feel pride when you heard, "thank you Mr. Bush and thank you America"?

On a lighter side my grandaughter is getting ready to lose her bottom 2 front teeth. She is a little afraid because she thinks she won't be able to eat.

Sunday, April 06, 2003

The war moves on and hopefully we are closer to the end without chemical or biological weapons hitting our troops. I pray that our guys find the bad stuff before it is used on them or the Iraqi people.

I have a granddaughter that is hearing impaired. If anyone reading this also suffers from hearing loss I'd like to hear from you. We are maybe facing having to look into a cochlear implant in the future and this poses a dilemna for us. What is best for her?

I also have another granddaughter that just turned 8 on the 4th. She is being raised by a single mom who is doing a great job.

I am bipolar so if anyone reading this suffers from mental illness it would be interesting to share experiences with you.

Today I fee terrible. I have fibromyalgia and the weather is damp and cold and making me feel like I'm in a pressure chamber. My sinuses are acting up; headache, eyes tearing up, etc. I don't want to complain because there are people who suffer much more than me. And, I am grateful to God every daay for all my blessings; even the ones I may not see or know.

That about covers it for today.

Friday, April 04, 2003

Hey anybody! I'd like to hear some cute grandkid stories. Also, I have a son in the Navy so if there are parents or loved ones of service people I'd like to hear from you too. This is a scary time for all of us but I have a lot of faith and faith and grit got me this far in life. I believe that to serve our country for its freedoms is so unappreciated by most Americans. Spend time with an immigrant and you will get a fresh outlook on what we take for granted.

Wednesday, April 02, 2003

test post from Dan

Welcome to Me, Myself and I! If you are crazy, funny, have an attitude or are a grandparent aand/or Christian I would like to talk with you.